On her return from yet another flight, Alice hurriedly made her way to the right floor. She paused at the door, catching her breath as she envisioned the joy on her husband’s face. A smile spread across her lips as she pressed the doorbell, but no one answered. Ringing again and again, she speculated that Nikolai was likely sound asleep, oblivious to the doorbell’s chime. Frustrated, she fished her key out from the depths of her handbag and unlocked the door herself.
“Nikolai, I’m home! Where are you, darling?”
Where could he possibly be at such an early hour? Usually, he slept until seven, given that his job only required him to start at nine. Stepping into the bedroom, she noticed the neatly made bed. The kitchen also exuded an aura of cleanliness, and the refrigerator contained the untouched meal she had prepared.
“I don’t understand… Is Nikolai cheating on me? Has he been living with another woman all this time while I was away?”
Alice’s heart sank under the weight of dreadful thoughts, tears welled up in her eyes, and a bitter lump settled in her throat, making it hard to breathe. She collapsed onto the living room floor, gazing mournfully at her suitcase, filled with gifts she had bought from exotic destinations. Among them was some sake she had somehow managed to smuggle home. Suddenly, she sprang to her feet, wiped her tears away, and dialed her husband’s number, eager to express her frustrations. Yet, the phone sadly remained silent, the operator’s voice reiterating the same message – the subscriber is temporarily unavailable, please call later.
“I… I didn’t expect this from you. You even turned off your phone to avoid being disturbed…”
Alice paced through the rooms like a disturbed tigress, talking to herself, a habit she resorted to whenever she was anxious or enraged. Fatigued from the long flight and the uncertainty, she brewed herself a strong coffee and lit a cigarette. Thoughts swirled in her mind, each darker than the last. Unsure of where she had gone wrong that led her husband to stray, memories flashed before her—how they first met, the innocent and uncomplicated boy who had captured her heart. She vividly remembered the day she visited an auto shop for a simple oil change. Clad in a stained uniform, Nikolai still managed to charm the young flight attendant, prompting her to hand him her business card. The following evening he called, and they conversed until dawn. As fate would have it, he grew up in an orphanage, getting a job at the auto service straight after vocational school, where he had been working for nearly a decade. Alice, having experienced life in an orphanage herself, intimately understood the hardships he had faced.
She still shuddered at the memories of how she was violated by the director of the orphanage, how it led to an investigation, and eventually a court trial.
The fourteen-year-old girl felt the sting of being disgraced, and to compound her suffering, she discovered she was pregnant from that scoundrel, leading to an abortion. That incident left Alice wary of all men, especially those older than her. However, thanks to the new director, her fate took a different turn; the director ensured Alice saw psychologists, discussed her feelings, and assisted her in securing a university spot in civil aviation after graduating from the orphanage. Now, as a flight attendant, Alice had everything she had once only dreamt of: a cozy three-room apartment and a brand-new Audi, yet her personal life was mired in confusion.
Her first relationship lasted three years, but after learning that due to her previous abortion she would never be able to have children, they parted ways. She spent a long time recovering but eventually met Pavel, who showered her with such care and attention that it felt like a fairytale. However, disaster struck once again when she found out that Pavel was married and had been for quite some time, forcing her to end the relationship herself.
After this, she swore she would never look at men again, yet something about Nikolai drew her in, compelling her to make the first move. It turned out to be a good decision; they started dating and moved in together within a month. A year ago, they tied the knot. While they didn’t have a wedding ceremony, she was content to become the wife of a humble, family-oriented man. Nikolai was never one to require a second request; he would clean and prepare dinner for her upon her return, take out the trash regularly, and even recently renovated their bathroom all by himself. They enjoyed long walks together during her days off, and it seemed this couple would never tire of each other’s company. Yet now, Alice was left grappling with the puzzling question of why her husband would ever contemplate infidelity.
She approached the mirror, examining her reflection. The flight attendant’s uniform fit her perfectly. Her long chestnut hair was styled neatly, and her large blue eyes resembled those of a Barbie doll. Thoughtfully hanging her uniform in the closet, she changed into a tracksuit and stepped outside. After a moment’s deliberation, inexplicably, she climbed into her car and drove to the auto service. Nikolai wasn’t there, but she learned from his colleagues that he had taken two days off to address family matters.
Alice felt a sense of foreboding as there had never been issues in their relationship. She drove around town a bit longer before returning home. Time passed, and still, there was no word from Nikolai. When night fell and he hadn’t returned, anxiety set in. She spent the entire night wide awake, and the moment morning arrived, skipping breakfast, she rushed to the police station to report her husband missing. They found him quickly, but what followed felt like the stuff of nightmares.
It turned out Nikolai had been in a car accident and was hospitalized in a local facility. Alice couldn’t grasp why he wasn’t in a city hospital, but the attending physician explained that because the accident occurred near their town, the injured were brought there first. While she was processing this shock, a young woman approached her, appearing unkempt and weary.
“So, you’re Kolya’s wife?”
“Yes, and you are…?”
“I… I’m the mother of his child.”
“That can’t be true!”
“Oh, but it is. We were married once, but we had to part ways because he didn’t like my drinking habits. I left my daughter with my mother, then moved to the city for work. I met someone new—he’s nice enough, but he’s not taking care of my daughter from my first marriage. Kolya sent my mom support money when he could, but she recently passed away, and now no one is looking after Marina. For various reasons, I can’t, and Kolya didn’t want to interfere, saying you wouldn’t understand because he hadn’t mentioned the child to you. I wanted to put her in an orphanage, but Kolya wouldn’t allow it, saying he’d take her instead, but then he got into that accident… I don’t know what to do. Maybe I will have to send her to an orphanage after all…”
“Wait! Bring the girl here. If Kolya wanted to take care of her, we will too.”
“Really? You won’t change your mind?”
“I won’t change my mind.”
The woman hurried away to fetch the child, leaving Alice weak and slumped onto a chair in the corridor. It was astonishing; she couldn’t have children herself while someone else didn’t know how to rid herself of a child for a new partner. It dawned on her that she had wrongly accused Nikolai of infidelity; he hadn’t betrayed her. But why hadn’t he disclosed that he was previously married and had a child? Ahead lay many responsibilities for Alice: getting to know a child unwanted since birth and supporting her husband through extended rehabilitation. Yet she believed she would manage. She would raise the girl as her own, and she would help her husband recover. Everything would be alright, as long as there were no more secrets in their family.